Friday, April 28, 2017

This Father Daughter Article Made Me Cry

I read this article on Refinery29 by Ashley Ford about her relationship with her father after he got out of prison after serving 30 years. I was so touched by how much he wanted to know about her and be a part of her life. It was beautiful. Just beautiful. I have a complicated relationship with my father because before 17 he was an amazing father to me but when he left our family, which included two very young children, to start a new life on another continent and followed that up by barely calling or visiting us, he was no longer the dad I remembered or grew up with.  So when I read about this father who missed out on so much and when he was able to be with his children he wanted to know so much and really fill in as many of the missing pieces he can and really know who they are and who they were. I wished my own father was so interested in me and my siblings but he's not. The last time he visited my dad spent more days in Las Vegas at the casinos (three days, if you're curious) than he did with my younger sister and brother, the children that he left when they were 6 and 9 (he spent less than a day with them). They are now strangers to him and it's not their fault.  Maybe one day my dad will be that person who is interested in our lives and wants to know who we are as opposed to just asking how we are and then running out of things to say.  I can only hope. For now, knowing there are fathers out there who truly want to reconnect with their children and get to know them, it somehow does give me a bit of comfort.  If not me, at least them.